I'M BACK TO BLOGGER. SEEMS TYPEPAD WANTS MONEY AND THEY OBLITERATED MY FATGUYIN NEMOURS BLOG.

SO AFTER A LONG ABSENCE

I'M BACK

APARTMENT RENTAL FRANCE

Apartments for rent 64 m2, 2 Bedr., 1 bath.. Rental 20 minuted from Paris Very comfortable 3 room apartment (64 m2) on the 3rd floor of a pleasant residence with elevators and secured entrances (interphone) with a balcony overlooking ... Free online ads

FACEBOOK

I'M ON FACEBOOK NOW AND I POST THERE ALMOST DAILY , SO CATCH ME THERE. JOE KROBOTH

STILL ALIVE

I'M STILL AROUND AT FATGUYINNEMOURS OR TRY MY FACEBOOK.

FACEBOOK

LAST POST HERE...GO TO FATGUYINNEMOURS

WE ARE NOW OFFICIALLY MOVED FOR GOOD TO NEMOURS, SO THAT'S WHERE ALL FUTURE POSTS WILL APPEAR.
GO THERE AND VISIT OFTEN!

HITCOUNTER OF VISITS TO THIS BLOG

AND HERE I AM ON MAY 1O,2006 WITH MY NEW EYEGLASSES







<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< THIS IS ME NOV 20,2005

THIS IS ME FEB 5, 2006
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
THIS ENTRY WILL ALWAYS BE THE FIRST YOU SEE
BECAUSE I UPDATE IT TO SHOW AS THE FIRST ENTRY.

SO READ ON>>>>>>>

YOU ARE VISITER

TO MY BLOG SO FAR SINCE
SEPT 15,2004

AND THIS IS ME 47 YEARS AGO
<

CLICK HERE ON WEEKENDS AND DURING VACATIONS

WE GO TO NEMOURS ON WEEKENDS AND OTHER SCHOOL VACATION PERIODS.
SO THAT'S WHERE I'LL POST DURING THOSE PERIODS.

P.S.
SINCE MY OPERATION I'VE POSTED HERE. SO LQQK AT BOTH SITES OFTEN.

BIRD CRIME

Message from my daughter:
This attempted car theft was thwarted by me the other day

HOME AGAIN

ANNIE GOT HOME YESTERDAY FROM 3 WEEKS IN TROIS-EPIS.
SHE LOST 2 1/2 klg.
IT TOOK 6 HOURS FROM DOOR TO DOOR EVEN WITH THE NEW TGV FROM STRAUSBURG , WHICH IS 2H 20MIN. IT WAS LATE OF COURSE. A PLANE WOULD HAVE BEEN FASTER.
ANYWAY SHE BROUGHT ME 3 FRESHLY MADE PRETZELS FROM ALSACE....MMMMNNN.

WRONG!!!!!!

THEY TASTED JUST AS BAD AS THE ONES I MADE.

THEY ARE NOT WHAT I REMEMBERED WHEN I WAS THERE.

OH WELL, I REALLY HAVE TO GO TO PARIS AND GET THEM AT THE GERMAN STORE NEAR THE GARE D'EST.

YOU JUST CAN'T WIN.

PRETZELS

BORED BEING HOME ON SICK LEAVE, I DECIDED TO TRY THE RECEIPE FOR PRETZELS ANNIE SENT ON A POSTCARD. I USED THE EXACT MEASUREMENTS AND WHEN THEY WERE DONE THIS IS THE RESULT. I FOUND THEM TOO SWEET . I THINK THE AMOUNT OF SUGAR IN THE RECIEPE WAS TOO MUCH. THEY WERE JUST OK. STILL NOT A PRETZEL LIKE I REMEMBER .

IT NEVER FAILS

I HAVE ONLY 1 MONTH LEFT TO WORK, THEN IT'S RETIREMENT.

YESTERDAY ON MY LUNCH TOUR I FELL AND SOME PEOPLE HELPED ME UP.

MY LEG HURT AND MY ARM WAS SCRAPPED BUT I FINISHED THE DAY. AS THE EVENING PROGRESSED I HURT MORE AND MORE AND HAD DIFFICULTY GETTING UP FROM A SITTING POSITION. TODAY I WAS NOT ABLE TO GO TO WORK.

I WENT TO THE DR AT 5PM AND LOW AND BEHOLD NOTHING BROKEN. BUT I HAD A STRETCHED TENDON IN MY RIGHT LEG. SHE GAVE ME AN ARRET DE TRAVAIL TILL TUESDAY. ON MONDAY I WILL GO BACK TO SEE HER AND I SHOULD BE BETTER BY THEN. REST REST IS ALL I NEED.....



I COULDN'T EVEN MAKE IT TO THE END OF THE MONTH WITHOUT SOMETHING HAPPENING.

FLASH INFO FROM THE NEW GOVERNMENT

ACCIDENTS AND DEATHS HAVE GONE UP 10% AND 8% RESPECTIVLY THIS PAST YEAR IN FRANCE.
THE NEWLY APPOINTED MINISTER OF TRANSPORTATION HAS A NEW IDEA ON HOW TO MAKE THESE FIGURES DROP.
HE IS GOING TO SUPRESS THE SIGNS TELLING YOU THERE IS RADAR UP AHEAD. WOW! WHAT A GREAT IDEA. IN FRANCE THE FIXED RADARS ARE ALL SHOWN SO THE MOTORIST KNOWS WHEN TO SLOW DOWN, AND AFTERWARDS SPEEDS UP LIKE THE MANIAC HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN.

WHAT BULL SHIT!
IT TOOK THEM THIS LONG TO FIGURE OUT THAT IF YOU KNOW WHERE THE RADAR IS, YOU ARE CAREFUL.
EVEN WITH THAT ASSININE SYSTEM THEY GIVE THOUSANDS OF SPEEDING TICKETS EACH YEAR. THIS IS JUST ANOTHER EXAMPLE OF THE FRENCH MENTALITY.

I REST MY CASE!

GONE FOR 3 WEEKS

THIS MORNING ANNIE LEFT TO TAKE THE TRAIN TO ALSACE.

SHE WILL BE AT

: CENTRE MEDICAL LES 3 EPIS

: SQUARE MARCEL RIVIERE

: 68410 TROIS-EPIS

I CALL IT THE "FAT FARM" , SINCE I WENT THERE SEVERAL YEARS AGO TO LOOSE WEIGHT.

SHE NEEDS TO LOOSE WEIGHT TO RELIEVE THE PRESSURE ON HER BACK WHICH CAUSES HER TO BE IN CONSTANT PAIN.

I HOPE I SURVIVE FOR 3 WEEKS WITHOUT HER.

NOONE TO TELL ME I FORGOT TO SHUT THE RED LIGHT ON THE TV

NOONE TO TELL ME I WET THE WOOD ON THE CUBARDS

NOONE TO TELL ME TO PUT THE SOUND DOWN ON THE TV

AND NOONE TO TELL ME TO HANG UP MY CLOTHES.



I LIVED A LIVE OF A SINGLE GUY FROM 1978 TO 1991, AND YOU WOULD THINK THAT I CAN SURVIVE. BUT I'VE BEEN TRANSFORMED INTO A HUSBAND AND HAVE NO BRAIN ANYMORE

CLICK HERE IF YOU WANT A BIO OF ELAINE STRICH

MY DAUGHTER AND ELAINE STRITCH

UPGRADING TO MORE SPEED

FROM A SCOOTER TO A YAMAHA....CATS AND FRENCHMEN ARE SO ALIKE!

TWO THINGS I DISLIKE

ARE CATS AND MOTORCYCLE/SCOOTER RIDERS IN FRANCE.

DOUBLE TROUBLE

ANOTHER DAY OFF

I SLEPT TILL 8H30, HAD BREAKFAST, WENT BACK TO BED, GOT UP AT 12H30, HAD LUNCH, PUT THE DISHWASHER ON AND WENT TO THE COMPUTER. IT IS NOW 14H32 AND I HAVN't BATHED YET AND I MAY TAKE A NAP.

SOME LITTLE KNOWN FACTS ABOUT FRANCE

THE MAILMAN

HAS A UNIFORM OF SORTS, JACKET, RAINGEAR ECT.

BUT HE IS NOT OBLIGED TO WEAR THEM.

IN THE RECENT PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION,

A MAILMAN IN HIS 30'S CAME IN 4th

OUT OF 12 CANDIDATES

WITH 4.5% OF THE VOTE.

HE WEARS T-SHIRTS AT ALL EVENTS!

A FIRST !!!

I AM GOING TO BE 65.
IN ALL OF MY LIFE THERE IS A
THING I HAVE NEVER EXPERIENCED,
IT HAPPENED TODAY.

IT CAME SO UNEXPECTLY,
IT WAS AN HOUR BEFORE IT SET IN.

MY WIFE, A WOMAN, SAID,...............

I'M SORRY.

OH......MY.....GOD.....
THAT MUST HAVE BEEN THE FIRST TIME IN ALL HUMANITY THAT
A WOMAN SAID I'M SORRY TO A MAN.

LEAVING ECOLE JACQUES PREVERT TO GO TO CARNAVAL

PROCESSION OF KIDS AND PARENTS

GOING TO ECOLE JEAN JAURES

I WAS THE REAR GUARD OF THE GROUP.

THE KIDS AT THE CARNAVAL

TAKEN PLACE ON MARCH 24 2007.

PARENTS AND CHILDREN HAVING A BALL.

CLICK TO SEE WHY I LOVE HER

MY WIFE LOVES GAURANTEES. I DON'T.
BUT MY MINOLTA DX WENT ON THE BLINK AND SHE SAW THERE WAS
A COULPE OF WEEKS LEFT ON THE GAURANTEE.
SO SHE BROUGHT IT BACK TO FNAC .
A MONTH PASSED AND NO WORD.
SO WE WENT TO CHECK.
IT WASN'T FIXED YET ,
SO THEY LENT US A CANON.
I LOVED IT AND WE WENT ON VACATION WITH IT.

WELL WE WERE BACK A WEEK AND WE GOT A CALL TO COME FOR THE CAMERA.
DAMN THEY FIXED IT.
BUT WAIT. THEY DIDN'T FIX IT ,
SO THE GAVE US A NEW ONE.
A BETTER ONE TOO!
CLICK OT THE LINK TO SEE THE CAMERA THEY GAVE US.

YOU CAN'T WIN

THE OTHER DAY I SAW GREEN TOILET PAPER IN ANNIE'S FAVORITE BRAND AND THOUGHT IT WOULD GO GOOD IN THE NEMOURS GREEN BATHROOM.



WRONG!
SHE HATES THAT COLOR GREEN.
WOMEN!

I STINK !

FOR THE LAST SEVERAL WEEKS
I'VE NOT BEEN BATHING IN THE MORNING.
THIS ENABLES ME TO SLEEP AN EXTRA HALF HOUR.
I TAKE A BATH IN THE AFTERNOON OR EVENING.
SOMETIMES I GO A DAY OR TWO WITHOUT BATHING.
I CHANGE MY CLOTHS EVERY DAY.

BUT THIS IS ANOTHER EXAMPLE OF
GETTING FN OLD!

THERE WAS A TIME WHEN I'D BATH 2 OR 3 TIMES A DAY.

THE CLOCK IS
COUNTING DOWN!!!!!!!!!

DAMNED ECONOMY

IN THE LAST WEEK
I HAVE LOST 15.6% OF MY I.R.A. RETIREMENT.
SINCE I DIDN'T HAVE THAT MUCH IN IT TO BEGIN WITH,
THAT IS A BIG CHUCK.

OH WELL, YOU CAN'T TAKE IT WITH YOU!

JOB WELL DONE

THE START AND THE FINISH AT MY POST.

CLICK ON PHOTOS FOR LARGER SIZE

A GREAT PHOTO....NOT MINE

THIS PHOTO WAS TAKEN FROM ALLAN THINKS http://allanthinks.typepad.com/AND CAN BE FOUND ON THE FLICKR SITE BUY CLICKING ON "A GREAT PHOTO.....NOT MINE"
OTHER PHOTOS OF HIS CAN BE FOUND THERE TOO.

A WORD TO YOU

WHAT'S NEXT

HE'S BACK

MY BFF IS BACK.
I MISSED HIM AND CALLED.
IT'S WATER UNDER THE BRIDGE.
I DIDN'T TALK LONG SINCE I WAS
CALLING FROM MY CAR BEFORE
I GOT OUT TO BE AT MY POST.

I'VE BEEN THRU ALOT WITH HIM AND I
JUST HAD TO MEND THE FENCE.

I'M GLAD I DID!

CLICK HERE.....NO MORE SUCKERS

THE LADY WHO ILLUSTRATED P.T.BARUM'S PHRASE ,
IS DEAD!
SHE PAST AWAY FROM CANCER.
MAY SHE REST IN PEACE.

ANOTHER DAY, ANOTHER EURO

IN ORDER TO GET A DRIVERS LICENSE IN FRANCE
YOU HAVE TO GO TO DRIVING SCHOOL.
IT COSTS ABOUT 1000 $US TO GET ONE
DEPENDING ON HOW STUPID YOU ARE.

THAT'S THE REASON THERE ARE OVER A MILLION
PEOPLE DRIVING WHITOUT A LICENCE IN FRANCE

THE TEST IS QUITE DIFFICULT.
ONEC YOU GET THE LICENSE YOU HAVE TO HAVE
A BIG "A" IN RED ON THE BACK OF THE CAR FOR
3YRS TO SHOW YOU ARE AN APPRENTICE DRIVER.
AFTER THAT IT'S GOOD FOR LIFE.

ONCE THE FRENCH PASS THE PERMIT IT IS SYSTEM D. WHICH IS
IF YOU DON'T LIKE THE RULE YOU IGNORE IT.
THAT IS WHY 90% OF THE ASSHOLES WHO DRIVE,SPEED,GO THRU STOP SIGNS, DON'T SIGNAL, AND STOP IN THE MIDDLE OF A CROSSWALK
WHEN THERE IS SOMEONE CROSSING.

IT'S A GOOD THING THERE ARE ONLY 167 DAYS LEFT BEFORE I
END MY CAREER AS SCHOOL CROSSING GUARD.

A FUNNY THING HAPPENED THIS MORNING

A WOMEN STOPPED HER CAR AT THE CROSSING AND SAID STILL THERE!
SHE THEN SAID I HIRED YOU.
THEN IT CLICKED.
IT WAS THE WOMAN AT THE TOWN HALL
WHO HIRED ME IN 1999 TO DO THE CENSUS.
SHE REMEMBERED ME!
WELL THAT MADE MY DAY.

THE LAST DAY

OF AN UNEVENTFULL VACATION.
WE BOTH GO BACK TO WORK TOMMORROW.
IT IS 40 DAYS UNTILL THE NEXT VACATION.

THE TERMITE TREATMENT WILL BE DONE
THEN AND WE WILL GO AWAY FOR 2 DAYS
AFTER IT IS DONE.

Google Toolbar Button Gallery

Google Toolbar Button Gallery

NO LUCK VOLUME 3

IT'S OUR FIRST DAY OF X-MAS VACATION AND ANNIE IS IN BED
WITH A BACTERIAL THROAT INFECTION.
WE WERE SUPPOUSE TO GO TO NEMOURS THIS MORNING ,
BUT I THINK THAT WON'T HAPPEN.
I SLEPT ON THE COUCH LAST NIGHT SO I WOULDN'T CATCH IT FROM HER.
BUT I'LL PROBABLY GET IT WHEN SHE IS WELL AGAIN.

SUCH IS LIFE!

CLICK ON THIS FOR .....THANKSGIVING 2006

THE LAST TIME

I HAVEN't SPOKEN OF THE SUCKER OF THE DAY FOR SOME TIME.
THEY HAVEN'T STOPPED SINCE APRIL.
THIS NUT GETS THEM TO CARRY HER LITTLE
SACS TO HER HOUSE.
HERE SHE SITS WITH HER SAC AFTER HER SUCKER DIDN'T GO TO HER DOOR.
SHE WAITS FOR ANOTHER WHICH SHE FINALLY GETS.
TODAY SHE GOT 3 PEOPLE WHILE I WAS ON DUTY.
THIS IS THE LAST TIME I WILL MENTION HER.

JUST TO LET YOU KNOW THE SUCKERS ARE STILL A DIME A DOZEN.

AND NOW

MY WIFE GOES INTO THE HOSPITAL TODAY TO FIND OUT WHAT'S WRONG WITH HER.
HER SPIN AND THE PAINS IN THE ARTICULATION.
TESTS AND NO INDICATION HOW LONG IT WILL BE.
THE HOSPITAL IS IN PARIS, SO I NEED TO GO
BY TRAIN (EASIEST) TO VISIT HER.
IF IT'S NOT ME IT'S HER.
DOCTORS, HOSPITALS, WHEN WILL IT END.
NO DON'T TELL ME, I KNOW.
WHEN WE ARE 6ft UNDER!

THIS PAST WEEKEND IN NEMOURS

ANNIE EXPLAINS IT SO MUCH BETTER THAN I CAN. EVEN IF IT'S IN FRENCH.
WE HAD COMPANY FOR LUNCH ON SATURDAY.

"Pour commencer, Joe ne se sentait pas bien et avait un malaise attribué à une chute de tension mais cela faisait bien 3 semaines qu'il n'en faisait plus. Il était tout blanc quand nos invités sont arrivés et on l'a cantonné dans un fauteuil.
Puis, pendant l'apéritif, Gilbert a eu un malaise avec perte de connaissance et tremblements. Il est tombé sur Geneviève qui croyait qu'il voulait ramasser quelque chose par terre. Quand on a réalisé ce qui se passait, on l'a redressé et Gilbert qui n'a rien vu venir est revenu à lui mais il n'avait aucun souvenir du malaise, on a voulu l'aider à s'asseoir dans le canapé quand cela a recommencé. Cela a duré environ 30 secondes et 15 secondes la 2ème fois mais c'était assez inquiétant pour que j'appelle le 15 qui m'a envoyé les pompiers. Ceux-ci ont trouvé une tension très basse et sont restés jusqu'à ce que Gilbert signe une décharge quand la tension est redevenu normale. Gilbert se sentait très fatigué mais tout semblait être redevenu normal.Apparemment cela fait la 2ème fois que cela lui arrive. Crise d'épilepsie, mini accident cérébral ... ? Il a très peu mangé, bu de l'eau et André l'a raccompagné jusqu'à Velizy. On a tous vérifié au téléphone que tout allait bien. On lui a dit d'aller voir son médecin pour un check up au minimum. Il n'a pas trop envie. Il envisage quand même d'y aller mercredi s'il a le temps... Je vais lui téléphoner jeudi matin pour savoir.
Je voulais que les pompiers prennent la tension de Joe puisqu'ils étaient là mais Joe n'a pas voulu. Il a retrouvé de la couleur dans le milieu de l'après-midi. Il n'a pourtant mangé que la bouchée à la reine. Il faut dire qu'avec les
événements, on a mangé froid et trop cuit. C'était complètement raté!
Puis la journée s'est déroulé sans problèmes d'où les photos qui nous montrent en bonne santé!!!
Le soir, Joe n'avait pas faim comme d'habitude mais il s'est forcé à manger une pomme et un peu de viande et vers 20h30 il a eu un malaise mais c'était différent des habituels. Il était trempé de sueur, blanc et son coeur battait à plus de 160, je n'arrivais pas à compter assez vite. Il m'a fait peur et on a rappelé le 15! Cette fois, les pompiers (2 de la même équipe du midi!! ) et le samu sont venus. Ils ont fait un électrocardiogramme et une intraveineuse de sucre car c'était un malaise hypoglycémique. A 9h30, tout le monde est reparti et on est allé se coucher avant qu'autre chose n'arrive !!!
Je crois néanmoins qu'on se rappelera de cette journée !!!"

AND THAT'S THE REST OF THE STORY!

VACATION

AS THE SUN SETS..........
HOORAY!
I'M ON VACATION TILL NOVEMBER 6th.

CAN'T WAIT TO SLEEP LATE AND BE LAZY.
TWO OF MY FAVORITE PASSTIMES.

BACK TO WORK

GLAD TO BE BACK TO WORK TODAY.
BUT I AM ALSO GLAD THAT THIS IS
MY LAST YEAR WORKING.

I ALMOST FORGOT WHAT ASSHOLES THE DRIVERS WERE
AND THE STUPID PEDESTRIANS WHO ARE JUST ASKING
TO BE RUN OVER.

THE STRESS OF WORRYING IF SOMEONE WILL BE
KILLED DURING MY TIME AT MY POST IS JUST
TOO MUCH.

I DON'T GIVE A DAMN IF THEY GET KILLED,
(THEY DESERVE IT)
BUT NOT ON MY TIME!

BUYING FURNITURE

45 YEARS HAVE PAST, I'VE CHANGED COUNTRIES, AND BUYING FURNITURE IS STILL A CRAP SHOOT.

WE GOT OUR BEDROOM SET DELIVERED IN NEMOURS IN JUNE.
THE DELIVERY GUY DAMAGED SEVERAL SHELVES AND
ALSO THE CEILING WHEN HE PUT IT TOGETHER.

ANNIE WROTE AND CALLED THE STORE AND THE DELIVERY SERVICE SEVERAL TIMES AND FINALLY THEY ORDERED REPLACEMENTS.

TODAY, 4 MONTHS LATER SHE MADE A SPECIAL TRIP TO NEMOURS TO HAVE THE PIECES CHANGED.
THE DELIVERY GUY DAMAGED A LEG OF THE SMALL BUREAU BUT MANAGED TO CHANGE THE TOP. BUT THE SHELVES FOR THE ARMOUR WERE NOT THE RIGHT ONES.

NOTHING HAS CHANGED IN 45 YEARS!
YOU CAN NEVER COUNT ON GETTING YOUR PURCHASE IN GOOD CONDITION.

HOW LONG BEFORE IT'S FINISHED?
YOUR GUESS IS AS GOOD AS MINE.

BEFORE MY SHOWER

THIS MORNING I WEIGHED MYSELF.
I WAS 258.38 lbs OR 117.2 klg.

THE LOWEST I'VE BEEN IN YEARS.
I AM NOT TRYING!
I HOPE I FIND MY EQUILIBRIUM SOON.
WHEN MY FOOD INTAKE IS ENOUGH TO KEEP MY WEIGHT STABLE.

I DON't WANT TO BE A SKINNY OLD MAN WITH FLABBY SKIN!

TRY TRY AGAIN

ALL MORNING I'VE BEEN TRYING TO POST VIDEOS OR THE ROOMS AND ATTIC IN NEMOURS TO MY FATGUY IN NEMOURS BLOG TO NO AVAIL.
IT SEEMS LIKE THEY ARE HAVEING PROBLEMS WITH UPLOADS.
TOO DAMN TIRED TO KEEP TRYING SO I'LL FORGET IT FOR NOW.

I'M GETTIG STONGER, BUT I STILL AM NOT WELL. I DID GO DOWN FOR THE MAIL TODAY. THAT'S A START. TOMMORROW I'LL GO TO THE GARAGE.
WEDNESDAY I HAVE AN APPT WITH MY DIABETES DOCTOR AND THAT WILL BE A BIG OUTING FOR ME.

P.S. TRY NOT TO EVER GET A GALL BLADDER OPERATION!
IT IS NO PICNIC!

MY LATEST PROBLEMS STARTED SEPT 11 2006

ON SEPT 11th I WAS TAKEN TO THE ER BY THE FIREMEN AND AFTER SEVERAL HOURS IN THE ER I WAS ADMITTED. I WAS OPERATED ON SEPT 13 FOR AN INFECTED GALL BLADER. I WAS IN INTENSIVE CARE TILL SEPT 20 AND WAS RELEAST YESTERDAY ON SEPT 22nd.
I'M STILL TOO EXAUSTED TO WRITE THE COMPLETE STORY...BUT AS I RECOVER I WILL RECOUNT MORE.
I HAVE SICK LEAVE FOR 3 WEEKS AND HOPE TO GET BACK TO WORK AFTER THAT.

THE RETURN OF "THE SUCKER OF THE DAY"

I DON'T KNOW WHO IS CRAZIER,

THE WOMAN WHO ASKS SOMEONE

TO CARRY HER PLASTIC BAG,

OR THE ONE WHO WINDS UP

CARRYING THE BAG.

BACK TO WORK

WELL I’VE BEEN BACK TO WORK SINCE MONDAY. SAME POSTE, BUT NEW KIDDIES AND MOMS. IT SEEMS LIKE THERE ARE MORE KIDS THIS YEAR.
REGRETFULLY IT’S MY LAST SCHOOL YEAR, BECAUSE AT 65 THEY PUT YOPU OUT TO PASTURE WHEN YO WORK FOR A MUNICIPALITY.
IT’S A PITY BECAUSE I LIKE THE NEW UNIFORMS WE HAVE. IT MAKES US LOOK MORE OFFICIAL.

THIS IS THE COLD WEATHER ONE WITH A ZIP IN LINING AND A HOOD.

THIS IS THE WARM WEATHER ONE

MEDICAL MISERY

FOR ABOUT 2 WEEKS I'VE HAD A WORM SHAPED FIGURE FLOATING IN MY LEFT EYE.
I WENT TO THE OPTOMOLOGIST YESTERDAY MORNING AND SHE SENT ME TO THE HOPITAL DU DIEUX IN PARIS. THEY ARE THE EYE SPECIALISTS.
IT SEEMS I HAD A TORN RETINA AND THE WORM WAS THE EYE FLUID LEAKING OUT.

I WENT HOME AND HAD LUNCH AND ANNIE AND I TOOK THE TRAIN TO PARIS.
IT WAS EASIER THAN TAKING THE CAR AND MORE DIRECT.
AFTER WAITING 3 HOURS I GOT TO SEE THE INTERN WHO TOOK ME TO THE LASER ROOM AND SHOT MY EYEBALL ABOUT A HUNDRED TIMES WITH THE LASER BEAM.
IT SHOULD TAKE ABOUT 2 WEEKS BEFORE WE KNOW IF IT TOOK.
IN THE MEANTIME I CAN DO EVERYTHING BUT HAVE TO WATCH OUT FOR FLASHES OF LIGHT AND COLORS WHICH IS A SIGN OF A TORN RETINA.

WHAT A COUNTRY!!!!!!

I WENT TO MY BANK THIS MORNING TO DEPOSIT SOME CASH.
THERE WERE NO SECURITY DOORS WORKING AND THERE WAS A SECURITY GUARD(HA) WITH A GUARD DOG IN THE ENTRANCE.
THERE WAS ALSO A SIGN SAYING SOMETHING ABOUT TRANSACTIONS.
WHEN IT WAS MY TURN I ASKED CAN I DEPOSIT SOME CASH?
THE TELLER RESPONDED BY SAYING NO.
I THEN ASKED WHEN CAN I?
AND SHE SAID BY THE END OF THE MONTH.
SHE GAVE ME THE LOCATION OF ANOTHER BRANCH.

WHEN I GOT TO THE OTHER BRANCH THERE WAS GUARD DOG WITH A MUZZLE ON, LYING DOWN OUTSIDE AND A SECURITY GUARD (HA HA ) ON THE INSIDE PLAYING WITH HIS MOBILE PHONE.

I WENT TO THE TELLER AND DEPOSITED THE CASH TO MY ACCOUNT IN THE OTHER BRANCH AND ASKED WHAT WAS THE PROBLEM AT MY BRANCH.
SHE TOLD ME THERE WERE 2 HOLDUPS ON CONSECUTIVE FRIDAYS THERE.

NOW YOU KNOW THE REST OF THE STORY!
WHAT A BUNCH OF AHOLES RUNNING THIS COUNTRY'S BANKS.

THE MORAL OF THIS STORY IS,
"IF YOU NEED MONEY, ROB A BANK IN FRANCE"